For all of us, the world is full of challenges, pain, hardship, and loss. But, that’s not all there is. There’s a world full of wonder and awe; love and connection; joys of the body, mind, and spirit. It is a full, complete world out there.
And, we don’t get to pick and choose. Because, it’s all mixed together–the highs and lows, gain and loss, joy and sorrow.
We get hurt. And, sometimes we hurt so much we question how we can survive it. But, we do survive. Which, in itself is a beautiful miracle. Sometimes, though, we don’t appreciate the proof we just received, of our strength and resilience. No. Instead, we remember how hurt we were. We begin to carry a fear of returning there.
So, we lock the doors that we think might lead to that pain. We think we are protecting ourselves.
Then, something else happens, and there is more loss and pain. Again, we survive.
But, again, we remember only more pain, and we lock more doors. As we live, we are again and again confronted with more loss and more pain. We survive it all, but now our entire focus has become locking every door that might lead to any more pain.
Our world is shrinking, smaller and smaller, and we don’t even see it. We also don’t see how amazingly strong and resilient we are. We’ve got plenty of scars that show that we are survivors; that we are greater than our struggles and setbacks. We have forgotten how exciting it feels to do new things and meet new people; to explore unknown territories as we rewrite our self-definition.
Life is a proving ground, where we learn how great our capacity is: to love, to face challenge, to overcome adversity, to help others, to unite…and to celebrate it all!
That begins by being willing to suffer; being willing to go places that may hold suffering. Because, in truth, anywhere that’s worth going comes with some measure of loss, struggle, and pain. But, you can do this. You’ve done it before, remember? And, just think about the experiences that will enrich and fill your life!
Start seeing your Fear as the doorway to adventure and growth. Sure, it’s scary and your knees knock a little. Unlock and throw open that door anyway. Then, take the time to notice, “Am I suffering, right now?”
You’ll start to see that, most times, you’re actually okay. Most times. Sometimes, though, there will be some struggle, some pain. Trust yourself; you can handle this. Remember that you’ve handled this and worse. Remind yourself that this will pass. Focus on self-care, self-love, and self-belief. Know that this is only a part of your journey, and it is absolutely leading you to where you want to go.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Fear since listening to Martha Beck’s Webinar, How to Harness Fear into Fuel. I think this topic is so worthwhile, and Martha’s talk gave me a lot to consider. If you’re feeling the same way, I want to invite you to join me in continuing the conversation! I’m hosting a free live conversation, “Fear is Your Rocket Fuel!” next Wednesday, March 18, 2015 at 5 P.M. PT / 8 P.M. ET. This will be a chance for you to ask questions and share with others about how Fear shows up in your life and how to start applying Martha’s insights.
Sign up today to receive all the details for the call!
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