What’s One Thing You Want to Change?

As we close out one year and begin a new one, it can be a really good time to reflect on how things went and are currently going and set new intentions for what direction we want to head next. Other transition points can be moments and events such as changing jobs, ending or beginning a relationship, starting a new school year or term, or contemplating a move across the country or even across town. 

When reflecting back, it’s important to be mindful. Research shows that we are prone to negativity bias, where we register negative stimuli more readily, and we also tend to dwell more on these negative events. One way to counteract this tendency is to use prompts that guide our reflections and the way we remember things. Good prompts can help us widen our attention and reflect more fully, directing us to be less critical and more discerning.

A transition point like the year’s end is also a good time to assess the path we’re on and consider whether we want to change course. It’s said that to get a rocket to the moon, they don’t just set coordinates and send the rocket into space. Instead, systems repeatedly check the rocket’s location along the way and make continuous micro-corrections to make sure the rocket reaches its destination. Consider these transition points as opportunities to make sure you are still heading where you want to go.

If you want to give this a try, here is a simple set of prompts you can use. 

First, Reflections.

• Start by writing down three wins you had this year. Write a paragraph about each, including why it was a win and especially how it made you feel. 
• Next, think about three challenges you faced, and again write a paragraph about each, describing the challenges themselves and especially how they made you feel. 
• Third, for each win, identify some challenge that existed within it; and, for each of the three challenges, identify one element that went well. 
• Finally, for each win and each challenge, write about one lesson you learned or that was reinforced. 

Next, Intentions.

• Begin by sitting quietly and trying to see who and where you want to be in ten years. When you can feel it, write two or three paragraphs describing where you are and the life you are living. Do your best to bring it to life: How are you spending your time? How do you dress? What do you eat? Who do you spend time with? And most importantly, how do you feel?
• Next, imagine where you will be in five years’ time that allows you to reach your endpoint in ten years. Again, write about your life five years from now, especially how it makes you feel.
• Third, imagine where you want to be a year from now to be on the trajectory that gets you to your ten-year endpoint. Write about it.
• Finally: What is one thing you can change now to move you toward that trajectory?

I invite you to give these prompts a try. Please relax and have fun with them! You want to do dreaming and scheming from a place of play and imagination! If you do give this a try, please post a comment. I’d love to hear how it goes for you!