Greetings Creator,
Yesterday was a day filled with walking, work, and conversation. Thank you, Creator, for the beautiful day, and the energy and inspiration to which I connected.
Most weeks I have a conversation with my friend, Jeannine – a fellow life coach I met when we were both training in the Martha Beck program. Our friendship and working relationship has changed and grown over time.
Initially, our conversations focused on discussing and practicing the techniques and philosophy we were learning. During, and especially since, there’s been a quest to not only master the tools we were taught, but to find and own our own voice and practice.
It’s not only shop talk, though. We also share with each other the events and direction of our lives, often within the context and light of our shared perspective and language of coaching.
It can be helpful to reflect and debrief the ups and downs, the twists and turns, and the roadblocks of my life’s journey. I am grateful to have Jeannine’s friendship and partnership in my life.
Of course, there are times when we frustrate each other. Times when we see or catch a glimpse of something that may be holding the other back, or that we’re avoiding. I know I’ve had moments where I’ve thought, “I really don’t want to hear that right now.”
It’s funny, really. There have been times when I’m stuck and struggling, and I share my story. If Jeannine spots something that can crack my thinking open and change my perspective, she tells me. And still, I might resist.
Ever done that?
I think it’s about vulnerability and shame. There’s this old thinking for me, that it’s my job to figure out how to fix my problems. That there’s shame in getting stuck, and struggling with it. So, the last thing I’m “supposed to” do is admit I’m struggling and accept help.
As the old question asks – “How’s that been working for me?”
It’s been revolutionary for me to challenge that old thinking; to dare to change. Here’s what’s happened when I’ve gone directly against that old thinking; when I’ve shared my struggle and accepted help.
First, by opening up into where I feel vulnerable and weak, I’ve been embraced and accepted by those I can trust. I’ve built connection and strengthened my trusting relationships. Second, I’ve learned new and helpful things about myself, and have gotten help seeing my blindspots. Third, with all this information, I’ve felt encouraged to make different choices and create meaningful change in my life.
Since I started opening up with my struggles, partnership with those I trust, and invoking real, healthy choices and change in my life; I have come to understand that there is nothing brave about hiding – hiding my weaknesses and struggles, hiding my blindspots, pretending everything is okay.
Pretending to be okay is nothing like actually being okay. Pretending to be happy is nothing like being happy. Keeping isolated and hidden doesn’t create connection and trusting relationships. And, frankly, pretending and staying hidden is non-stop, exhausting work. There are so many ways to spend our time and energy – Do you really want to waste them, because you’re afraid?
Another factor to consider is that we’re all in this together. Are there any of us who don’t have blindspots; who don’t have old ruts in our thinking that no longer serve us? Who don’t struggle sometimes with the change that inevitably comes to our lives?
It can be one of the most powerful and courageous choices we make, to do something about these things, instead of hiding and pretending.
Coaching is one avenue that can build a trusting relationship and create positive change in your life. You learn about yourself and rediscover who you truly are and want to be. We form a partnership to investigate what works for you, and what matters to you. We focus on your Intentions and Dreams, and create ownership and accountability, to make sure you are on Your Path, Looking Forward to Your Future!
If you aren’t where you want to be, and wish your life was different – know that there’s something you can do about it. If my approach – being honest, open, and authentic – appeals to you; well, then let’s have a conversation!
Dare to claim the life you want!
Thanks for your love and companionship, Great Spirit!
Recent Comments